Are You Feeling Alone In Your Alternative Relationship?
Are you looking for nontraditional relationship counseling that will support your polyamorous partnerships, but are only finding normative couples or marriage counselors?
Perhaps you’re struggling with your relationship, but you’re concerned that a traditional therapist will judge your preferred kink or BDSM lifestyle.
Or, perhaps you are interested in exploring consensual non-monogamy or polyamory, but don’t know where to start.
Have you discovered that you might be kinky, and you’re unsure how to communicate this with your partner?
Do you wish you could find a sex positive therapist who can support your unique journey of sexual discovery?
When you’re in an alternative relationship, finding a qualified counselor who understands and supports your non-normative lifestyle can be frustrating. Maybe you’ve felt unaccepted, shamed and even discriminated against for having a particular fetish or for having more than one partner. You may have realized that you need the guidance of a counselor, but you’re worried that a therapist will judge or pressure you to conform to a normative relationship model.
When you’re just beginning to explore your sexuality, discovering that you might be poly or kinky, it can feel isolating and confusing. When suppressed feelings build up, it can feel increasingly risky to come out of the closet. And, you may not know how to describe your feelings to your partner or friends. You may furthermore fear that your loved ones will not support you when you do.
Every Type of Relationship Experiences Challenges
If you are in or seeking to explore an alternative lifestyle, you are not alone. A study from 2014 estimates that approximately 9.8 million couples in the United States identify as practicing polyamory, polyfidelity, swinging or another form of ethical non-monogamy. The Journal of Sexual Medicine finds that kink and other sexual fantasies are also very common.
More and more, people of all gender identities are discovering that a monogamous lifestyle doesn’t work for them or that vanilla sex isn’t really what turns them on. Whether the challenge is in learning how to have an open marriage in a way that works for all parties, to expanding your family to include a new live-in partner and their children; relationships are complex. Issues can arise no matter how many partners or the preferred type of sex.
If you practice a specific kink, fetish or BDSM, you may experience unique relationship challenges, such as feeling alone in your preferences or how to carefully navigate and communicate your desires. Fortunately, with the guidance of a compassionate, sex positive therapist, you can feel more confident having those important conversations so that you can work through your problems and experience satisfaction in your romantic relationships.
Alternative Lifestyle Counseling Can Help You Discover and Evolve Your Unique Relationship and Sexual Expression
Bumps in the road happen in any relationship; however, poly relationships have unique dynamics that require a qualified poly friendly, sex positive therapist. During our sessions together, I will work with, honor and support the structure of your relationship as you define or envision it. Sometimes, poly couples struggle with creating boundaries that feel right for all partners. With a little guidance, you can create and establish working agreements that support your consensual non-monogamous lifestyle so that all partners feel understood, comfortable, safe and valued.
If you are a kink identified person, you may have given up on having the type of sex you want. Or, you may want to explore a newfound kink safely, but and aren’t sure how to begin -- by yourself or with others. I am a kink and BDSM friendly therapist who respects your sexual expression and desires, and I can work with you until you’re able to proudly integrate your sexual preferences in your life. You don’t need to feel embarrassed or self-conscious about your fetish or kink. Progressive therapy promotes and nurtures self-acceptance and confidence, ultimately helping you to become who you were meant to be.
As a holistic practitioner with over 20 years of experience and specialized sex therapy training from the Buehler Institute, I offer collaborative, customized treatments that have helped many people discover and achieve their therapeutic goals. Sexuality is a journey, not a destination. Having a committed and compassionate sex therapist supporting you on your path can help you thrive and find joy.
You may understand the benefits of alternative lifestyle counseling, but you still have some lingering questions and concerns.
I haven’t told anyone about my fetish, and I’m worried that a counselor might tell me that I’m not normal.
There are several cultural stigmas about alternative sexualities, and as a result, it’s incredibly common for people who enjoy sexual kinks, fetishes or BDSM to wonder if they are normal. Kinks and fetishes can be as wonderfully varied as the individuals who express them, and when practiced in a consensual manner that doesn’t harm others, they are completely normal and healthy. I am a kink friendly therapist who will not judge your unique BDSM expression. I will honor your diversity and help you to discover safe ways to express your sexual identity.
My partner and I are interested in opening up our marriage and exploring polyamory, but I’m worried that a counselor will think we’re hurting our relationship and work to change our minds.
I am a poly friendly therapist who values the validity of all relationship structures, including the vast configurations of consensual non-monogamy. I do not intend to change who you are in the name of social conformity. I know that poly relationships can be just as healthy and happy as monogamous marriages. I encourage you and your partner to explore an open marriage if that’s what you both want. And, while you and your partner embark on this exciting journey, I can help you both improve your communication about your individual needs and desires, form shared agreements and ultimately and strengthen your bond and flourish in your open marriage.
You Don’t Have To Go Through This Alone
If you have any questions or would like to discover more about alternative lifestyle counseling, I invite you to contact me for a free 20- minute phone consultation.